We often get our first labels as children; something a resilient person has to challenge as they grow into the professional they want to be.

As a child, you may have been 'the smart one' and your brother 'the naughty one'.

While given as children, these labels often stick around far longer than they should.

They can even follow you into your career.

A resilient person chooses to unpick the labels they've been given, or even adopted themselves, to see if they still help.

All too often they are now getting in the way of who you could become.

As an ICF Master Certified Coach, I'd encourage you to unpick the labels holding you back.

I was reminded of this when speaking with Mairi, a professional woman, after a talk I'd given to her FinTech employer.

She complimented me on how confident I appeared, giving such a big talk to 'all these people'.

I thanked her but admitted I'd always been deemed the 'shy one' when I was a teenager.

She was surprised but agreed that people could change over time.

With a smile, I asked Mairi: "How have you changed then?"

We sat in the auditorium, which had now mostly emptied.

Mairi's pace slowed down and she said: "I'm not sure those labels were ever really true. Or perhaps I just needed to get away from them to prove to myself that they didn't have to be."

A resilient person must do this.

They question the assumptions made about them by others, as well as the labels they've given themselves.

Through our coaching sessions, my clients discover which labels are holding them back.

These aren't always childhood labels—sometimes they're professional identities that once served but now limit.

"The technical expert who shouldn't be in leadership."

"The details person who can't think strategically."

"The one who needs to work twice as hard to prove herself."

These labels shape how you show up, what opportunities you pursue, and how you advocate for yourself.

This means in our coaching sessions we explore questions like 'What labels was I given in the past and how have I outgrown them?'

For me, challenging the 'shy one' label meant recognising that introversion isn't the same as lacking confidence.

I'm still introverted—I recharge alone, I think before I speak, I prefer depth over breadth in relationships.

But I'm not shy.

I speak to hundreds regularly.

I challenge audiences.

I ask difficult questions.

The label my family gave me was about their comfort, not my capacity.